Sometimes the journey may get tough…
I recently found myself drowned with stress, between juggling working as a teacher and being a graduate student with an occasional social life. I worked very long hours and on days I had to attend class after work, I ended up feeling exhausted both physically and mentally. Every Sunday afternoon, I began dreading my upcoming week. I had anxiety about work and school. I was mostly unhappy with work, because I did not feel comfortable in my environment. There was no camaraderie among my co-workers and I felt a cloud of negativity hovering over my head . I contemplated quitting, because as you all may know, it is easy to find yourself in a comfort zone with your job – regardless of how much you dislike it. There is a high level of dependence on the weekly/bi-weekly paychecks.
So, I contemplated for weeks, because I was unsure of how I was going to pay my bills, especially my student loans. I also felt a sense of responsibility to my friend (who recommended me for the job), my co-teachers (who depended on me), and my school leader (principal), to stay despite being extremely unhappy and frustrated. For the first time in my life, I knew what it felt like to be very unhappy. As a very spiritual person, I felt like this unhappiness was blocking me from being open to the world and all that it had to offer. I felt like I was blocking my blessings.
One Sunday afternoon, while sitting on my couch and contemplating the beginning of my week, I knew this feeling that overcomes my body, this feeling that makes me weak to my knee, this feeling that makes me sick to my stomach, had to stop. I walked in to work the following Monday and gave in my resignation letter, with a week notice. Walking out of my boss’s office, knowing I had taken the best, yet scariest decision, was a bit nerve-racking. However, at that specific moment, I couldn’t help but smile. I felt liberated, excited, unsure of what my next steps where going to be, but confident that the universe will subdue to my wishes.
After leaving the job, I stayed home for a week, took a trip out of the country, and started working on content for my blog. I also got a new job (which I enjoy), that balances out my life as a student and as a free-spirited being.
This past 5 months have truly being a testimony of faith and courage. Faith in every action/step that I take in life. Faith in myself. Courage to make the hardest decisions. Courage to believe in myself and live my life in accordance to my beliefs and personal happiness.
I hope that you get a bit of inspiration from my experience, and if not I hope you enjoyed reading about my journey.